I’m going to try and make this short and sweet, because there’s no point in dwelling on the negative things, the only way you can move on is to concentrate on the finish line.
When I was in primary school I was “the chubby girl”. I never had a boyfriend, I never felt comfortable in my own skin, and as I went on to high school this feeling grew until I was so depressed that I used to beg my Mum to let me change schools. I wasn’t bullied, but I was so, so lonely. And I felt like I was doing something wrong, because I literally had no friends.
So, throughout my second and third year of high school I stopped eating. I starved myself until I gained perfection. I wasn’t by any means unhealthily skinny, but I was a lot smaller than many of my class mates. At my skinniest, I got a boyfriend. This only egged me on further.
For the next few years I continued to get boyfriends, break up with them, find another, etc etc. However last year, after me and my boyfriend broke up I put on a lot of weight. Since then I haven’t had another relationship.
What do you think this would do to a teenage girl? To constantly have someone by her side for years, who loves her and shows her affection, and then as soon as I put on weight, I lost it all.

I have always been obsessed with my figure, and I can’t remember a time when it wasn’t of utmost importance to me. Every time I put food in my mouth, all I can think about is the calories; exactly what am I putting in to my body? There is constantly a voice in the back of my head, telling me I’m fat, telling me I’m unhealthy, telling me everyone is better than me, prettier than me, more popular than me, the list is endless. I have never been diagnosed with an eating disorder; I am however on anti-depressants, although of course they are in no way the same thing. I have wondered before if I have the mentality of a person with an eating disorder, however my BMI has never fell below the mark, and why would “the chubby girl” have an eating disorder? So no attention was ever brought to it, not that I’m complaining.

For about a year now I have been single, and while I am in a relationship I am very much a puppy dog, following them around and relying on them for an opinion. Being on my own has helped me to gain independence and find my own personality, which I never got to do in my earlier teenage years.

Another factor that makes me rely on weight loss so much is that I have, (in my opinion) no other talents. While my friends can sing and dance, and play the piano, I can do none of these things. The only thing I can do is have control over my own body, therefore it has always been something of great importance to me.

I made a new years promise to myself that I would get healthy, fit, and happy. I made this blog as a method of helping me along the way, along with other things. I will try to answer every question you might have, and I hope that through this blog I can help others as well as myself. This is not a thinspo blog, nor is it a fitspo blog, is a blog to help me, and to help as many others, to be happy in their own skin. I will do almost anything for my followers, so if you have any requests, don’t be scared to ask, because I will always be here for all of you.
Through my followers I have made some great friends, and hope to continue doing so, as I value each and every one of them. If you follow me, I will talk to you, so don’t be surprised when I strike up a conversation, I’m only trying to be friendly :)

That’s about all I have to say, if there’s anything else you want to know just message me and I promise to get back to you as soon as I check my blog. Stay lovely xx